sometimes

sometimes i am so preoccupied with the difficulties of today that tomorrow seems so far away.

sometimes nobody seems to know what i'm trying to say, and i feel so lonely i wanna escape.

sometimes life throws me something i don't understand, and i am forced to slow down and look at things. in perspective.

sometimes i feel like everything is probably okay anyway.

sometimes these everything just explode like a nuclear, and shake and scare me.

sometimes i just feel like writing something that sounds cheem, to make everything feel like they're part of a single entity called life. and immediately it feels abit ok.

突发奇想

上个礼拜六有点疯狂，有点感动。陈绮贞的演唱安歌了五次。演唱会半途就不顾礼貌地站起来了。然后再站上椅子上。最后更跑到舞台前面，沉溺在当下最美好的时刻。演唱会来得很是时候 - 在自己对未来和人生有点茫然的时候，它好像一股很爽的微风。很喜欢她说的‘不管你的梦想在哪里，让我们现在起飞’。起飞可能不难，难在于怎么在人生和岁月里面寻找秉持梦想的孩子气。

紧张的礼拜二我没怎么睡。用了一整晚的煎熬换来一个五分钟的presentation。紧张因为对自己的方案没有什么信心。煎熬因为要影响别人，得先说服自己。

慵懒的礼拜五有点疲惫。五天内有两个deadlines，已经让我感觉有些力不从心。因为突然间睡了个10小时来弥补两晚的通宵，所以懵懵懂懂的。上巴士公车的时候拖鞋莫名其妙地脱落而从台阶滚了下去，卡在门缝间。当下得赤脚弯腰把拖鞋拯救出来。顿时感觉十分尴尬，又很想笑。

清爽的礼拜六晚上有习习凉风，好像是弥补这两天难忍的炎热。杰奇突然播了陈绮贞的一首歌。很莫名的，突然想blog。突然又想起演唱会上的另一番话。文字已经不怎么记得了，大概意思是说改变，是活着的证明。改变，如果有机会和能力去坦然接受，可能会是种享受。人生，如果有机会和能力去回忆和品尝，可能就会增值。

不知道有多少人会来读这篇密密麻麻的华文字。不敢奢望这几行字能让谁感同身受，只是想把当下的感动化成比较长久的回忆。ok，也或许能够让谁有一点点的共鸣。我想这就是我所谓的突发奇想。可惜，此时此刻这种美好的心情，好像越来越难得。